We received Sara's financial aid package in the mail Thursday and it is amazing. We still need to crunch numbers and decide how much debt she wants to be in before accepting the loans but with her grants and scholarships she was awarded it covers her tuition cost. Its kind of pathetic that the room board and books cost more than the tuition. But its a college she really wants to go to and we will figure it out some how. So Congrats Sara.
:)
Saturday, March 13, 2010
And its the song that never ends, it goes on and on my friend
Music is an amazing thing. It has helped me through a lot of major downs in my life and is apart of some of my major highs also. I have had a song from Wicked keeping me going these past few weeks but even that is beginning to lose its lifting power.
Shit after more shit keeps hitting the fan. The latest is my computer being attacked by a virus so now we have 2 computers out of commission due to some one elses malice and no money to get them fixed. Mine is not as vital as my hubby's because I have a lot of other things in my life to keep me occupied namely 4 children, 4 horses, a dumb ass cat and dog. But it was just another wave of what next.
It is really pathetic when you can't even afford to pay for the overdue fines on a book at the library to take another one out. After the bank mistake, which don't get me wrong could have been much worse and I am thankful for that, its been really a lesson in frugality around here for the past week and a half. The stress is overwhelming at times.
I tried last night to make a gratitude list but breathing was about all I could come up with and even that I am at times not sure I am even grateful for. It hurts to much. I am grateful but at the same time tired so tired.
So here is my attempt at the list of 10 again.
1. That all my children are safe and healthy for the most part.
2. That I have a wonderful partner in my life that even when we are yelling at each other I know that this too will pass and at the base we love each other deeply and always will.
3. That I have a job that I like.
4. That I have a roof over my head for now.
5. That I have wonderful people in my life that love me and are there for me if I only ask
6.
oh well 5 is better than one.
Off to the barn to appreciate my horses for a while.
Stay safe, Stay warm, Feel loved.
TTFN
Shit after more shit keeps hitting the fan. The latest is my computer being attacked by a virus so now we have 2 computers out of commission due to some one elses malice and no money to get them fixed. Mine is not as vital as my hubby's because I have a lot of other things in my life to keep me occupied namely 4 children, 4 horses, a dumb ass cat and dog. But it was just another wave of what next.
It is really pathetic when you can't even afford to pay for the overdue fines on a book at the library to take another one out. After the bank mistake, which don't get me wrong could have been much worse and I am thankful for that, its been really a lesson in frugality around here for the past week and a half. The stress is overwhelming at times.
I tried last night to make a gratitude list but breathing was about all I could come up with and even that I am at times not sure I am even grateful for. It hurts to much. I am grateful but at the same time tired so tired.
So here is my attempt at the list of 10 again.
1. That all my children are safe and healthy for the most part.
2. That I have a wonderful partner in my life that even when we are yelling at each other I know that this too will pass and at the base we love each other deeply and always will.
3. That I have a job that I like.
4. That I have a roof over my head for now.
5. That I have wonderful people in my life that love me and are there for me if I only ask
6.
oh well 5 is better than one.
Off to the barn to appreciate my horses for a while.
Stay safe, Stay warm, Feel loved.
TTFN
Saturday, March 06, 2010
Another Senior moment soon to be in the Past!
Tonight is going to be one of those lasts again, the senior thing.
I have been doing really well this year better than last time I went through this but its only 10am and I’m already starting with the tears.
Senior Ball is this evening. She has a beautiful dress and the shoes were purchased yesterday and in a few hours she will be dressed to the nines and ready to dance the night away.
I am hoping the rush to get 2 places to take pictures and get kids to there assigned pick up points will quell some of the emotions I am feeling today but only time will tell if this will work.
Sean is going also with a good friend. He has his grandfathers tux coat and a pink shirt and will look smashing even without he 120 dollar tux.
It’s been a long tough week with little to no sleep. These events bring out the pain of not being able to provide for my family the way I would like too. Not being able to even put food on the table lately has increased the stress level to a point of explosion. Fighting is a main stay between several parties in the house.
I have been thinking in my mind of selling the farm getting rid of the animals and moving into a small house in the village it would be painful but would it be anymore so than what I am feeling now?
After the mistake with the bank last week I am so tired of living below the line. Not being able to breath for a second, worrying how and where the money is going to come from to pay the mortgage or buy groceries. I don’t want to be in charge of the money anymore but after thinking that through I have to be, even Dave admits it would be worse if he took over. So I’m stuck and obviously incapable of getting it done. Talk about between a rock and a hard place.
I checked into going back to school again and took another step farther and actually filled out the FASA to see how or if I could afford to go. That just depressed me more because it isn’t possible right now.
So for now I am putting one foot in front of the other and trying to enjoy the pleasures in my life and trying to make it work for the kids as best as I can. Tired so tired.
Stay safe, Stay warm, feel loved.
ttfn
I have been doing really well this year better than last time I went through this but its only 10am and I’m already starting with the tears.
Senior Ball is this evening. She has a beautiful dress and the shoes were purchased yesterday and in a few hours she will be dressed to the nines and ready to dance the night away.
I am hoping the rush to get 2 places to take pictures and get kids to there assigned pick up points will quell some of the emotions I am feeling today but only time will tell if this will work.
Sean is going also with a good friend. He has his grandfathers tux coat and a pink shirt and will look smashing even without he 120 dollar tux.
It’s been a long tough week with little to no sleep. These events bring out the pain of not being able to provide for my family the way I would like too. Not being able to even put food on the table lately has increased the stress level to a point of explosion. Fighting is a main stay between several parties in the house.
I have been thinking in my mind of selling the farm getting rid of the animals and moving into a small house in the village it would be painful but would it be anymore so than what I am feeling now?
After the mistake with the bank last week I am so tired of living below the line. Not being able to breath for a second, worrying how and where the money is going to come from to pay the mortgage or buy groceries. I don’t want to be in charge of the money anymore but after thinking that through I have to be, even Dave admits it would be worse if he took over. So I’m stuck and obviously incapable of getting it done. Talk about between a rock and a hard place.
I checked into going back to school again and took another step farther and actually filled out the FASA to see how or if I could afford to go. That just depressed me more because it isn’t possible right now.
So for now I am putting one foot in front of the other and trying to enjoy the pleasures in my life and trying to make it work for the kids as best as I can. Tired so tired.
Stay safe, Stay warm, feel loved.
ttfn
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